In Duval County, school has been out for a week. Many other private school’s in the area are done for the summer as of last Friday as well. We’ve put together a list of children’s activities that will provide some low-cost fun over the summer.

Depending on your level of handiness, here are three ideas that will allow you to spend some time with your kids (as well as the occasional neighbor who seems to spend every waking moment at your house). These require some tools and time to build and don’t cost much to build:

Huge Jenga (Home Depot or Lowe’s might cut wood if you ask nicely)
Tossing Washers Game
LED Hula Hoops (moderately difficult)

The beach can be fun and inexpensive. Pack a picnic, take an umbrella and towels, maybe some floaties or rafts or skimmers and you can spend the day enjoying the sand,  sea and surf! Don’t forget the sun tan lotion and hats for everyone.

Fort Caroline in the Arlington area is neat and educational. Walk the trails, examine the remains of the old fort, go in the Park Rangers’ facility and learn about wildlife, the early settlers and lots more. The cost is minimal. Take a picnic and enjoy it on the beautiful grounds. Saint Augustine is a treasure chest of delights! The Fort, the marinas, ice cream shops, and a walk down St. George Street. Learn about the early settlers and their lifestyles.

A short trip north and you and the kids can enjoy Fernandina. Lots of interesting things to see and learn in another quaint, small town.  Visit Fort Clinch while you’re there.

You’ll likely remember early days on the Slip-n-Slide to compensate for the sweltering Florida summer heat. Here are some tips from WiredGeekDad on Making Your Own Slip n’ Slide. Now that we’re on the topic of cooling things off, here’s a History of Ice Cream and a do it yourself primer to making Ice Cream in a Ziploc Bag and if you’d like to go the extra step, DIY Ice Cream Cones.

Remember, no matter the activity it’s often just time-spent laughing or goofing around that let your children know that they’re loved and cared for. Have a safe and happy summer, Jacksonville!

As a a Qualified Florida Parenting Coordinator and a certified as a Family Mediator I deal with divorce, child custody, and child support often. I came across this article and wanted to share it. It offers some very helpful advice for post-divorce co-parenting.

Please read the full Huffington Post article here:

Minnesota Judge’s Profound Advice For Divorced Parents

One of my favorite quotes from the article is:

“Be the kind of parent you hope your ex will be.”
Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D., licensed psychologist and marriage and family therapist

Post-split arguments are a fact of life. Please focus on what really matters moving forward: your children’s health, well being, and happiness. It’s all about the children.

For recently separated parents, the ‘normal’ issues surrounding holiday travel and visiting family takes on new and difficult dimensions. Here are some tips for those dealing with co-parenting/single parenting over the holidays.

Create New Traditions

This one can be rather tricky so keep things simple. The key is to involve your kids in something likeable enough to repeat at any age and memorable enough that they’ll tell there children what ‘their Grandmother/Grandfather made them do when they were kids.’ You also want to be sure the activity can be replicated the following year. While you should avoid embarrassing them, a little assistance in helping them ‘come out of their shell’ is OK.  Here are some simple ideas:

• Trimming and/or selecting a tree

• Singing carols to a few select neighbors or at a retirement home or community center

• Making cookies and delivering them to neighbors or friends

• Combine some ‘normal’ activities and give them a holiday twist – Monopoly or other board games and treats (eggnog, cookies, etc.) on Christmas Eve or Zot Hanukkah

 Communicate and Coordinate

This one isn’t as fun as decorating a tree or baking cookies, but may very well set the tone of the rest of your holiday. Be sure to explain to your children that you understand it may be tough on them to split holiday time with them (in time-sharing situations) and you’re going to do all you can to make it comfortable for them.

Some single parents coordinate with other single parents and create new holiday traditions. Involve your children in the planning (rather than try to duplicate pre-split holidays).

If you’re going to be away from your kids for the holidays, send a card/letter explaining how much you love them and let them know it isn’t there fault you’re not sharing this time together. Also, if technology allows, Skype, FaceTime, or GoogleChat with them. Plan something fun when you’ll see them again and have them choose an activity or event you can both look forward to.

With love, effort, and affection; the peace and joy of the season can be celebrated and shared!

Happy Holidays from the Law Firm of Sharon Johnson, PA.

Channel, Consistency & Collaboration

Channel – Find ways to allow easier (less emotional) interaction. If speaking over the phone or in person is an issue, try writing. Often times written words allow you to remove some of the painful feelings associated with recent separation and more effectively share information.

Text messaging can be useful but proceed with caution. Texts can easily lead to misunderstandings and overly emotive responses. If that’s the case, emails are a great way to provide and schedule updates, pickup/drop-off arrangements, and feedback on your children (behavior, school info, sleep/health issues, and any other relevant info). Another option would be ‘direct’ voice mail. Many of today’s cell phones allow messages to be delivered without calling the recipient. This may allow you and your ex-spouse a less stressful way to ‘speak.’ Find a communication channel(s) that works for you both and stick with it.

Consistency – In addition to applying a communication channel that works, keep an element of consistency in your messages. Deciding ahead of time what info is important will keep both parties from getting sidetracked. This is essential in co-parenting and custody situations. If both parents agree to a format, it becomes more matter-of-fact and allows easier use. Utilize the same channel(s) and keep the essential information consistent.

For example, set a daily recap of important events and issues your children are dealing with. Add categories and simply fill-in the details (i.e. Health – none, Study – spent extra time with math and timetables, Meals – found out they like frozen berries in applesauce as a treat). If you’re both consistent when relaying relevant information, your communication will improve.

Collaboration – The most fundamental element of co-parenting for communication is collaboration. Both parties most keep in mind the reason for ongoing, up-to-date dialog, the well-being of children involved. Communication collaboration between ex-spouses will lead to reduction in future conflicts. Most importantly it allows your children to be free from much of the he said, she said they are too commonly caught in. Come up with an applicable communication plan and keep your children free from that duty as much as possible.

Sharon Johnson is a family law and divorce attorney in Jacksonville, FL. She also serves as a Certified Family Mediator as well as a Qualified Parenting Coordinator. She is a member of the Florida Bar, the Jacksonville Bar, and the Florida Bar Family Law Section. To schedule a consultation or reach out to our law office, please call (904) 306-9926.

Here are some helpful tips for co-parents and single parents dealing with children returning to school for the first time following a divorce or separation.

Time Management and Study Habits

In a divorced or single parent home, sufficient study time with your children is difficult to achieve. Adding to the financial burden of a single parent are time constraints that seem to make laborious tasks like helping with your child’s homework seem impossible.  This is actually a time management teaching opportunity in disguise. By helping your child understand time limits within the framework of studying and homework, you are able to teach an important career lesson. How often is your boss or co-worker available at the moment you have a question? It’s very common thorough out daily tasks to have to table an idea and move on to other tasks before opportunity to address the areas we need assistance with presents themselves. The sooner your child learns this life skill, the easier the rest of their education and career will be.

Due to divorce, separate households can create another additional scheduling obstacles when it comes to homework. Differing parental work schedules, responsibilities, and locations all add to the necessity of a standardized daily study times.

Communication Is Essential

As parents, we often get shoulder shrugs and ‘not much’ when asking questions about what our kids are learning. Educational communication with your children is often difficult even in homes with both parents present. Do not let this deter you. Continuing to ask your kids specific questions about what they’re studying and discussing in class will provide you the opportunity to help and provide a level of accountability for your children. Set the precedent that you will follow up with teachers and, in co-parenting situations, that both of you will communicate regarding regular study times, behavioral issues, and class assignment.

Do your best to work with your ex-spouse as a parent and text or email when phone or face-to-face conversations are too difficult. Keep in mind that your communication with your children and ex-spouse are essential when dealing with field trips, tests, and other school functions.

School Interaction

Although sometimes difficult, be sure to inform teacher(s) of the divorce. It may also be helpful to request that two report cards are put in your child’s mailbox so he or she can share one with each of you. Establishing a separate relationship with the teacher(s) will provide better communication and follow-up. Often a quick office visit is all it takes to be added to the class email list. Many teachers will understand if you schedule separate parent-teacher meetings. Be sure the front office has both emergency contacts for you and your ex-spouse.

If you have questions regarding child custody, co-parenting, or mediation; contact the family law office of Sharon B. Johnson at (904) 306-9926.

The Divorce Law Office of Sharon Johnson is local Jacksonville practice focusing on all areas of family law. We are located at which is off Atlantic Boulevard near downtown.  Our office serves clients facing all aspects of divorce law in Duval, St. Johns , Clay, Baker, and Nassau counties including: Flemming Island, Orange Park, Ponte Vedra, and Jacksonville Beach Communities.

Divorce

If at first you don’t succeed | Try Changing Your Behavior  Dr. Terri Orbuch gives relationship and dating advice to those on the second go-round of looking for a husband or wife. Her 3 week plan offers some simple steps to changing the little things in our behavior before looking for ‘happiness’ elsewhere.

Picking up the pieces with potlucks and picnics? | Lois Tarter suggests Starting A Divorce Support Group to help deal with post-divorce stress. It will likely depend on how the individual handles transition. Some may seek other stress relieving activities like exercising, reading, or even picking up a new hobby.

Parenting

Dealing with the heat | Sometimes we need to get the kids out of the house but it’s just too hot, right? Well, we’ve come across these ideas for outside fun that won’t require spending another $50 on a slip-n-slide (that likely won’t last more than a day). 3 Ideas for DIY Water Play offers some easy, do-it-yourself options for keeping the young ones cool and allowing the older kids to lend a hand building something themselves. It’s a win-win (or even better, a water-win)!

Partnership advice from parenting class| Everything I needed to know about marriage…I learned from parenting is advice for putting parenting practices to work in marriages. Our favorite tip form Liz Finlay, laugh often.

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Of course, if you have a legal question pertaining to divorce, custody, paternity, mediation, or relocation; contact Jacksonville family law attorney Sharon B. Johnson and schedule a consultation or call (904) 306-9926.

As we continually transition towards a global society (for better or worse), we’re able to have a larger impact on the health and well being of those in need at home and abroad. The United Nations has specified 8 Development Goals. In a recent TED Talks Video, Jamie Drummond shares his thoughts regarding global goals and how much input we should have. He states:

“7.6m kids die of preventable treatable diseases every year. 178 million are “stunted”, a horrible term that means malnourished to the point of physical and cognitive lifelong impairment. And many people think new goals should be packed in with the old goals – such as on fighting corruption or environmental sustainability.  These are all vital issues. But there will have to be trade offs, tough choices, we can’t work on everything.“

Here is his TED Talk:

Should those in need (as Jamie states) have a say in how global funds are spent as to the order of necessity/need? Personally, I’d like to see third world education and nutrition higher up the ladder. What do you think, Jacksonville?

Parenting

Do as I say (and hopefully as I do) | In her most recent post Divorce and Parenting: Teaching Valuable Life Lessons to Your Children, Rosalind Sedacca offers parenting advice for post-divorce parents. Specifically, how to teach respectful and conciliatory actions to your children. She sums it up with “When you choose to learn from your life lessons, they were never experienced in vain.” Good stuff, Rosalind.

When 5 C’s are a good thing | In a recent parenting post, Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D. offers her 5 C’s of Divorce Co-Parenting. A simple, straight-forward, and easy to follow guide towards open communication in the interest of raising your kids while sharing custody.

Divorce & Your Finances

The 2nd time around may not be any easier or cheaper | Geoff Williams tackles divorce information for those considering their second split. He also addresses some common financial concerns including his argument for a prenuptial, uncontested divorce, and splitting assets.

Is “for worse” better or worse? | “New research suggests that government initiatives to strengthen marriage among low-income populations should move beyond promoting the value of marriage and instead focus on the actual problems that low-income couples face.” So concludes a recent study by Dr Thomas Trail and Dr Benjamin Karney of UCLA entitled: What’s (Not) Wrong With Low-Income Marriages.

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For Jacksonville area divorce, family law, and/or mediation questions; please call Sharon B. Johnson at (904) 306-9926 to schedule a consultation.

Here is an excerpt from one of her posts entitled: “Parenting After Divorce”

At the start, have a heart-to-heart talk with your children. Tell them that things are going to be pretty confused for a while but that you are trying your best to straighten them out and get the family running smoothly. Tell them you will need their help and they are going to have to be brave so you can help each other.

Then be very specific about what needs to be done and who will do it. Include your own responsibilities. Write it down and hang it in the kitchen. In one scenario, you will look for a place to live. In another, you may need to work some evenings or even weekends. While you look for a new place, the kids need to keep the home neat. There are household chores to be divided, meal preparation and clean up, laundry, feeding the dog, etc. Don’t forget to include nights off for mama — very important. Also include rewards. Plan holidays out with movies and special prizes for everyone. The same advice holds for Dad, especially if joint custody is awarded. Like much of parenting, it’s not easy but the rewards are worth it. Eventually it gets easier.

She will be missed.

The Internal Revenue Service amended the tax code related to the Child Dependency Exemption Deduction. Being able to claim the exemption for your dependent child has many significant tax advantages to the parent claiming the exemption. It is important to understand the summarized rule changes below, so as to not jeopardize your position if you are the parent entitled to claim this valuable exemption.

The changes to the tax code can be summarized as follows:

1. The custodial parent is the parent with whom the child resides the greater number of nights during the year. The non-custodial parent is the parent with whom the child lived with the minority (less than 50%) part of the year. This definition will be used for tax purposes regardless of what the divorce decree may state.

2. You must obtain IRS Form 8332 (Release of Claim to Exemption for Child of Divorce or Divorced Parents) to claim the exemption if you are the non-custodial parent. A divorce agreement or court order can no longer be used to substitute for IRS Form 8332.

If you able to claim your child as a “qualifying child” for the dependency exemption, you may be eligible for the following tax benefits: